Shaved and Ready

I shaved my head in preparation to be fitted with the NovoTTF-100A device. Tina and I fly to Chicago in the morning. I’ll post quickly about all the details. Below are just some other things that have been going on in my life.

Latest MRI

I had another MRI last Saturday in order to have a baseline for monitoring the effectiveness of the NovoTTF treatment. The preliminary reading of the images show that the tumor is growing. This seems like pretty bad news to me but it’s not getting me down. I have tremendous faith that these Tumor Treating Fields (TTF) will quell the tumor growth and even shrink the son of a bitch.

Fitness

Since my oncologist has me on a testosterone supplement, I’ve been very active. Going to yoga classes at least four days a week. Kicking and dribbling a soccer ball around the park. Bicycling around the block. And a bit of weight lifting. Today I bought a pull up bar. I’m convinced I still have time to develop a nice physique — something I never really cared about in the past. The ultimate rationale though is that a healthy body has a better chance at fighting disease. Thanks, Kevin G., for the training advice.

Placebo

All that time I participated in the immunotherapy clinical trial (ICT-107), we thought I was getting the real vaccine because I suffered the flu-like symptoms. But recently I learned that the sponsor likely puts something into the placebo to simulate the same symptoms. Boy, that made me mad. I’m over it now. I knew the chance I was taking. Still, it’s no fun to feel like a lab rat.

Alternatives*

Interesting people continue to come into my life. By chance, I am running into people who have experiences and opinions about the curability of cancer. The information they share with me is extremely encouraging. But research online reveals contrary views on these natural cures. Of course, I want to believe that something exists that will fix me and I do believe there is a lot I can do via nutrition and natural resources that can dramatically help. I’m not giving up on medical science though. Thanks, Stephen T., for helping me keep a healthy perspective on my situation.

Art

Yes, I have been painting on canvases, not just chalking sidewalks. I’ll post some pics eventually. But I want to thank my friend and meditation mentor, Nathan P., for giving me this creation of his.

N8P Skull art

Mementos

My friend Marcus M. was inspired to send me a spiked biker helmet, which reminded me of one of my favorite TV shows as a kid — Hogan’s Hero’s so I did my best Sergeant Schultz impersonation.

And thanks to Martha B. for the nice scarfs (or stole) that she made for Tina and I. She put a lot of thought and symbolism into the design and colors.

My apologies to the other hundred people that deserve a public thank-you from me on this blog. Everyone has been so kind, supportive and generous. It means the world to Tina and I.

Sadness

Every week someone contacts me about themselves or a loved one being diagnosed with my same cancer. I mention this so that you might be aware that the numbers are staggering. Cancers are striking everywhere. Why? I can’t tell you exactly, but there certainly has been recent verifications about cell-phone radiation being very dangerous especially to children. We know the practices in food production are problematic. Big companies aren’t going to be responsible. Doesn’t seem like government is doing much about it. So take responsibility yourselves. Just think if the statistics said you were going to die in December. Might be worth paying more attention to what you do and how you think.

More Crying

Again, I hate to share this, but at the very end of a yoga class this week, we were seated on our mats and finishing with a final añjali mudrā when I inexplicably started sobbing. I have no idea why. I wasn’t thinking about anything at all. I haven’t been sad or depressed. It was weird. Luckily I was the only guy in the class. I kept it under control and it was brief but I’m sure it was noticeable by some. The teacher explained that it’s part of yoga. I’m paraphrasing, but we carry emotions in certain areas of the body and certain poses can help release those emotions. I tell you what — I felt great after class.

Anger

Don’t think I’m this well-grounded, peaceful, at one with the Universe person now though. A driver made an illegal, and dangerous maneuver in order to get ahead of me and into the parking lot… OF THE YOGA STUDIO. It took all the tenacity I could muster to not confront her about the error of her ways. And why not call out people when they do asinine things? Seems like anger is as legitimate a feeling as is joy. I guess I have some more learning to do.

Namaste


*For anyone interested in specifics, things I’ve been hearing about include:

  • Hydrazine sulfate
  • BHT
  • Rife machine
  • Flor essence
  • Oleander soup
  • Wobenzym n
  • Various mushrooms
  • Phoenix Tears (hemp oil)
  • Salt
  • And even regimented procedures for how and when to drink WATER as a cancer cure

I’m all ears if you have an opinion to share!

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One response to “Shaved and Ready”

  1. Kim says :

    I believe expressing emotion in all its forms is part of your healing process. So, be sad, be angry, be whatever. I just finished reading a book that I found very moving and thought provoking. The title is Dying To Be Me. The author, Anita Moorjani, had a near death experience when her organs began shutting down from end stage cancer. She is alive and well now with no trace of cancer. She wrote the book about her experience before, during, and after the NDE. Fascinating stuff.

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