I’ve been getting a lot of friendly reminders that I have not published an update in a while. Last night, a good friend asked me in an email how I am holding up. Since I know other people want to know the same, I’ll share my response to him with you now:
I’m doing well. I feel great. Strong all around.
Treatment deals me a blow every 2 weeks but I rebound.
I feel love everywhere. It heals me.
That really says it all. I HAVE been writing blog posts — just not publishing them. Content is usually me rambling about very personal thoughts (that I end up deciding people don’t want or need to know) or proselytizing about health. Upon my own editorial review the day after writing, I decide not to “go to press.”
This coming Monday I get another 4+ hour infusion. I want to dread it because it makes me feel horrible. But I can’t let myself succumb to the negativity of dread because these drugs are part of my treatment and I will be thankful for them as long as I am making progress.
Then on December 17, I get my next MRI then travel to Duke to hear what my progress is and get their recommendations. Anyone interested specifically in what I do from a nutritional and holistic standpoint, I’ll post more about that next time. While I mainly post the good stuff that is happening for me, there are plenty of tough times and rough side-effects to deal with.
— THE END —
Posts That Never “Made It”
Here are a couple excerpts from the cutting room floor:
I’ve been doing the Chopra Center’s online 21 Day Meditation Challenge (www.chopracentermeditation.com). I do the meditation at night and last night after writing all the above [I had written a long post about my cancer being a “Godsend”], I put on headphones and listened to the next meditation. The topic was “Living Gratefully.”
The crux of this meditation was basically: By being grateful for all that you have and expressing that appreciation in your daily life, you open a channel through which abundance can freely flow. That is the attractive power of Gratitude.
This has been working for me all along. I haven’t been worrying and complaining about my cancer. I’ve been appreciating and embracing the changes it has brought to my life. And I’ve been flooded with an abundance — of love, generosity, good health and happiness.
…I recommend watching the documentary, Happy (click here to watch the trailer). I found it interesting and enlightening. Hell, I think I wept during parts of it — but I’ve had brain surgery. I don’t expect you to get choked up — just inspired.
Today the weather was beautiful. I spent a couple hours in the saddle [of my motorcycle]. Riding is one of my “Flows” — that is, something I can lose myself in. Engaging in activities like this impact our happiness. I also often lose myself in cooking and going to a metal show. Lately I have been in my studio, getting lost in painting and artwork.
I relearned a lesson by the example of my father-in-law over Thanksgiving.
He noticed a noise in my car when he drove it, and brought it to my attention by describing it. I claimed to not know the noise. So what better male bonding activity than checking out the engine. Well, I never knew too much about engines. I’ve always wanted to. (Side note to Wrenchers: I did do all the Rat Bastard recommended performance mods to my 2000 Shadow ACE myself.) So after 11 years of dependable Honda motorcycle engineering, I got the itch for the rumble and pride of American-made (Harley-Davidson). I couldn’t afford new and preferred a ratty, mean look anyway so I bought a used ’82 Harley FXR (shovelhead) — a shaky, smoky, oily rocket of chrome and steel that needed a lot more love than I knew how to give it. Since the price was within budget I figured it was the perfect way for me to learn by doing. That didn’t go so well, so it wasn’t long before I tracked down the nearest independent bike mechanic. Ron at All American Cycles has been helping me out (i.e., rescuing me) since 2009.
The lesson: Take care of your stuff, even the small details. We went out to check fluid levels. He popped the hood and I went to the garage to get a rag. I look back to see him picking leaves out of the hood vents and crevices. Simple tasks to maintain “health” and promote longevity.
While the men were outside checking oil, Tina’s mother was fitting her for a dress. When money is tight and the clothing budget is slashed, it’s handy to have a mother who is a clothing designer/maker.
Thanks for your help over the Thanksgiving holiday, Ken and Liisa.