Good News, Yet Conflicted
Duke called to inform me that my MRI reveals that the tumor is stable. It appears to have not grown. This was expected to be the best outcome possible. Of course, tumor reduction would have been better news but that was never expected for this particular chemo, Lomustine, for me.
This is very good news! Despite my diligent adherence to avoiding sugar and alcohol, we decided it was an occassion to celebrate and raise a glass of wine.
The recommendation is to continue taking this chemo, which really just means taking a second dose for now. One dose lasts six weeks. Side effects have been fairly minimal and tolerable, including:
- fatigue — I’ve been zapped of energy, but this could be attributable to the steroids I take (to control brain swelling);
- low blood counts — I’ll have to continue getting frequent blood tests. I had to have a platelet transfusion during my first dose. This is not a big deal though.
So what is there to be conflicted about?
I spent the last month doing intensive research and planning for a natural healing plan (my Plan B). If the MRI revealed that I should not continue this chemo, there really isn’t another one waiting for me to try. I have pieced together an intensive treatment regimen including, diet, nutrition, juicing, supplements, meditation, yoga, kinesiology, accupuncture, ayurvedic healing, pranic healing, and a variety of other holistic treatments.
The idea behind my plan is that the human body is capable of amazing self-repair. Nurture the body, mind and spirit to optimal condition, and the body can effectively fight disease and cancer, actually destroying tumors. This sounds too good to be true. Otherwise, everyone would be healthy, right? Reading about alternative and natural healing, it’s not difficult to be convinced that many industries in our society rely on Americans to continue eating poorly, watch lots of TV, drink soda and beer, and get fat and sick. There is lots of money to be made from the unhealthy.
I was ready to forego chemo for my custom-tailored plan because I believe: toxic chemotherapy often kills patients. I believe I’ve got the right plan as well as the tenacity, determination, passion, faith and luck to be one of the ones who survive following a natural healing plan. Tina, however, knows that I finally found something that is working for me, so carry on is the only sensible course of action.
I suppose that I have to accept that the chemo is probably responsible for stopping my tumor growth. I agree it makes sense to stick with it.
I will likely pursue my plan anyway while on the chemo although my medical doctors will likely discourage me from some pieces of it namely certain supplements, concerned that they may affect the efficacy of the chemo.